October 22, 2004
-
MISS AMERICA. I read in Wednesday’s paper that the Miss America Pageant lost its network telecast sponsor (ABC) for the first time in 50 years. Happy dance, happy dance. Now, even though I had a fleeting moment of optimism, thinking that maybe the pageant’s demographic, which has always been young women who were lead to believe that being crowned Miss America was the be-all-end-all of a fulfilling post-adolescent,-pre-womanhood, maybe this demographic was finally too educated, too NPR-saturated and high-friggin-falutin to buy into this crap anymore that the contest was finally succumbing to pageantry Darwinism, but, alas, that brief bit of optimism was eventually overtaken by the reality that the REAL reason that Miss America’s tv ratings were dropping so drastically and causing the show to be a money loser (even though they “dropped the talent contest and added skimpier swimsuits”) was that is just wasn’t skanky enough. Maybe if they had re-named it Miss Hot and Nasty America, or Miss America: Under the Sequins they could rope in some viewers, not that I want them to or anything, but I’m a little surprised that they think being Miss America is “all that” anymore. It used to be quite a hot ticket, being 20 and being Miss America. Now it’s like being the Desitin spokes-model or winning the Pillsbury Bake-off (read: Not Hot Ticket.) Although in my household being able to bake AND not having athletes’ foot all at the same time is not only an attainable goal but a respectable one.
In any case, I’m sure the beauties from across this great land of ours will find a home on a cable station somewhere in the ether. It will have no talent contest, which actually did display some modicum of the individual personalities and quirks of these women, but it will have a skimpy swimsuit contest. Could they at least swim? Evening gown competition, I believe, is still intact. The Big Question will be asked be asked (hint: correct answers include world peace, ending world hunger and Calvin Klein.) Wow. How do men get scholarships to college?
FAME AND FORTUNE. Well, online food review anyway. Here’s something I wrote that made it onto my favorite website. Woo and a Hoo!!
http://www.mcsweeneys.net/links/newfood/
Scroll down till you get to the Hamburger Helper review (yes, that’s right).
Kim
Comments (3)
I heard this during Leno last night and thought – what? And shows like ‘The Swan’ have a better message for our youngsters? Interesting blog, I’m glad I dropped in.
Sing it, sister.
If it’s on cable now, it really will be Miss Hot and Nasty America.
My husband and I both loved your review. I’m pretty sure the revulsion plus the compulsion to eat more was the msg.