March 1, 2008

• IN WHICH I ATTEMPT TO CREATE AFTER PROCREATING

  If this is creativity, I’ll take scotch…

  I
  have ideas. I have kids. I love my kids. I love my ideas. I have very
  little patience. My ideas don’t make noise unless I create it. My kids
  make noise even when I ask, at varying levels of civility, to hush,
  wait, play quietly or shut the hell up while mommy is functioning
  artistically. Then again, my kids are creative and I have blatantly
  ripped off my daughter as she plays piano, recording her secretly so I
  can steal her idea for one of my songs later. She’s nine, she’ll never
  know. Well, she will, but her concept of intellectual property is not
  as developed as mine yet. I need peace and quiet. A lot. My kids hate
  peace and quiet. A lot. They consider it a punishment. I’m not certain
  that we would each share 29 points of compatibility. For instance, I
  have been married and they have not. I can enjoy eating, saying and
  spelling cous cous. They only enjoy one of these. Today I’m thinking
  that not only am I pro-choice, but maybe choice should be retro-active,
  perhaps to age 25, according to my mom. I think maybe Bill Cosby even
  said something along the lines of “Look kid, I brought you into this
  world, I can take you out.” Well, it doesn’t sound like Bill Cosby,
  does it. Maybe he was trying to function artistically at the time and
  his kids were trying to play Kerplunk.

  Kim

  
  one loud child, cleverly disguised as a charming gentleman.  do not be deceived.  he will not buy you a glass of wine nor will he discuss literature, drama or “old Paris” with you.  he will only yell “poop” and run away.

  funny thing about this one, adopting the collective history of approximately 70% of his classmates, he now tells me he was born in Chicago and then moved here (to the central coast of California) where he had to learn English, since he only spoke Spanish as a baby. 

  • 8:02 pm
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